I was diagnosed with PCOS long before I realized what it really was: the black hole in my universe. I was in high school feeling strange changes happening around and inside me when all of a sudden I fast-forwarded life into university, sat in the cafeteria with a massive order of Chinese food and felt "fat" and "hopeless". I used this as an excuse to feel sorry for myself and not take the time or initiative to investigate into the problem - probably as a result of the onset of depression.
When I got married to my husband, I naturally felt the urge to change myself. I felt happier and now I had the companion I so longed to have in my life. I was ready to move ahead. By now, I was still overweight but I had other purposes to charge forward which ultimately (and fortunately for me) destroyed all hopes of depression setting in (related to PCOS naturally anyway...the dramas of being married...well, that's another blog).
I didn't realize that my black hole was getting larger and starting to suck me in. Miraculously, I became pregnant with my first daughter --> which shocked me to my core because according to one such fertility specialist: I had no hope of expecting unless I lose weight by eating pasta sauce and vegetables every day. After I had my daughter (and a little more time to do research in my first mat leave), I started seeing that maybe there's more to this black hole then I see from the outside. Maybe, just maybe, there's a way to fight it.
I started work again at the office and lo and behold, there's my answer all around me: people trying really hard to eat healthy and exercise. Duh! Why didn't I think of it before? What stopped me from seeing it before? I talked to my family doctor at the time who saw from my desperate look on my face that maybe I really wanted to get rid of this damn disease. She suggested I see a diet specialist (no name mentioned because of reasons I'll mention in the next blog) who will help me re-build my universe - no black hole included.
So with hope and an eager desire to learn more about my body and mind...I set off to conquer this black hole which has dominated the better part of my life.
Next --> PCOS diet regime...why I quit.
When I got married to my husband, I naturally felt the urge to change myself. I felt happier and now I had the companion I so longed to have in my life. I was ready to move ahead. By now, I was still overweight but I had other purposes to charge forward which ultimately (and fortunately for me) destroyed all hopes of depression setting in (related to PCOS naturally anyway...the dramas of being married...well, that's another blog).
I didn't realize that my black hole was getting larger and starting to suck me in. Miraculously, I became pregnant with my first daughter --> which shocked me to my core because according to one such fertility specialist: I had no hope of expecting unless I lose weight by eating pasta sauce and vegetables every day. After I had my daughter (and a little more time to do research in my first mat leave), I started seeing that maybe there's more to this black hole then I see from the outside. Maybe, just maybe, there's a way to fight it.
I started work again at the office and lo and behold, there's my answer all around me: people trying really hard to eat healthy and exercise. Duh! Why didn't I think of it before? What stopped me from seeing it before? I talked to my family doctor at the time who saw from my desperate look on my face that maybe I really wanted to get rid of this damn disease. She suggested I see a diet specialist (no name mentioned because of reasons I'll mention in the next blog) who will help me re-build my universe - no black hole included.
So with hope and an eager desire to learn more about my body and mind...I set off to conquer this black hole which has dominated the better part of my life.
Next --> PCOS diet regime...why I quit.
